Recovering from COVID lockdown

Howdy, my friends.

I wish to bring up an idea that I had broached last week on one of the Hael's Zoom meetings. It will be a while before we will be able to hold safe events. I think that our first gatherings will be small, local, pot-lucks rather than full, garbed events. Many of us are talking, on Facebook, about how they can't wait to hug one another and get back to normal. I don't want to slam on the brakes here, but I wish to point out that our current situation is going to have an impact on many of us. Our extrovert friends are having trouble not being with people, certainly, but our introvert friends are not only having the same isolation issues, but there is a real possibility that suddenly being surrounded by other people might set off anxieties and panic attacks. Especially when a dozen of your friends bear down on you for a group hug.

The transition from being alone for weeks at a time to surrounded by touchy-feely friends might overwhelm some of us. Particularly those of us who live alone. We might not be able to have get togethers until June or July, and we might not be able to have actual events until August or September, but we should start thinking about this, now, and plan for the possibility that some of our friends might not want to be hugged, or even touched.

I've been seeing color coded dog leads and harnesses, while out on my walks: Green for "okay to pet"; red for "don't touch."; yellow for "ask first". We should adopt a similar system for when we are allowed to act like normal SCAdians. We could wear something: a piece of duct tape; a scrap of cloth; a ribbon tied on one arm; that would tell others how that person feels towards physical contact, at that moment.

Green = Bring on the hugs. (go ahead and ask)
Yellow = I don't know, ask me first. (I might say no, even to a close friend)
Red = Nope. (Don't even ask)

Of course, always ask first before hugging another person, but you will be able to tell if a given person might want you to hug them from someone who doesn't want to be touched. Or who might have health issues and want to stay 6 feet away from everyone until we have a vaccine. We might have to use this system, or something similar, for a while. Almost all of us colored duct tape. Most of us have fabric scraps and safety pins. A good deal of us have colored garters. It should be easy to whip up enough green, yellow and red tokens for everyone.

I can't wait until we can get back to normal, but I also don't want to see any of my friends have panic attacks because their lives went from zero physical human contact to all of the humans in one room at once. I will admit that when the Hael has it's first post-lockdown party, I will reach a point where there are too many huggers and I need to stop. I love my friends, but after the first 20 hugs, I think I'll be done for the day: I'll trade in my green token for a yellow or red depending on how many people are there.

We should have a universal plan in place for when that golden day arrives and we can all get together, again. We should have plan so that we don't set off panic attacks and we can show love to our friends who need to slowly ease back into human contact. Please share this far and wide.